But the fragile edifice of their love would certainly come tumbling down. For that edifice rested on the single column of [his] fidelity, and loves are like empires: when the idea they are founded on crumbles, they, too, fade away.
Met half of the usual bunch today (“usual bunch” shall henceforth refer to the bali kids) for dinner and drinks. And, for a bit, we talked about things that matter. Then while I was bathing it occurred to me one of the reasons why I like them so much is because they know how to properly love a person. And they understand fidelity.
And these days you just can’t quite find that in people anymore.
14may
Hit the beach with Annie. Was initially disappointed because the sky was overcast and she had to keep reassuring me that we still do get tanned, in spite of

Anyway, the clouds eventually made way for the sun, which gave us both quite a good tan. We’d both brought books but because we hadn’t met in a while, we ended up talking the whole time. It’s always nice talking to her because she’s so rational and… objective. And when we talk Religion she displays such faith without being overbearing or presumptuous (which is, sadly, what many christians tend to come off as), so that I can talk comfortably about it with her. Always thankful for her, even though she was such a brat teasing me about my bareback top some ten years ago.


After she went off I met Daryl and Ken (who were catching a movie together) (I know right) for a bit at vivo. Because I wasn’t dressed properly (which D thought was a lame ass excuse) and didn’t have a jacket and had to (not really) rush home to clean up my room, I insisted on not watching Trance with them.
Later at night the girls came over.


I think the both of them have got to be my cutest friends ever. We waited for Jen till we were too tired and she was too tired, so she came over at 8 in the morning instead. Lazed in bed till we were more hungry than we were sleepy and walked out for some famous (and severely overpriced) duck rice (might I just add that my parents literally frown upon the idea of eating there because “it’s overpriced and not even nice” - I half agree tbh)
Came back to my place and caught Chicago over chips and cheesecake. Then we lazed around some more and I finally managed to convince them to head to vivo where we just sat down somewhere and talked till A had to go. Laziness at its best.


So our picnic plan fell through.
p.s. started on The Fault in Our Stars last night and finished it today. totally get all that hype about it. found myself quite often amused through the course of reading it, and sad at the same time. recommend.
p.p.s. currently reading: the wind-up bird chronicle. because it’s been awhile since I last read Murakami.
the other day I was on the bus and was just thinking, ‘public display of affection’ is such a nice way to put it
also, I hate that ‘talking about my feelings’ now constitutes only of talking about you.
These days it seems hardly possible to talk about real things and feelings with anyone anymore. I wonder if that is just part of growing up. Finding that you’re becoming more alone than ever.
It’s been over 10 days since exams ended and I haven’t had the time to update this space, so here goes. This post exam period has been nothing short of A M A Z I N G. I mean I understand the importance of doing meaningful things and planning for your future right now but I really don’t get people who rush into jobs/ internships/ whatever the minute summer begins. There’s just so much more to life than the rat race. Okay that came out cheesier than I’d intended…..
4 May: the day finals ended

Caught up on some sleep and met JC for a bit before heading to zouk. Survived the whole night on three hours of sleep. But it was really nice seeing all of the bali kids. For once everyone was there and they are the best company to celebrate the end of finals with.


Got a table at Velvet, spent the bulk of our time outside/ at wine bar. It turned out to be one hell of a night. 3am: Rode in Sherwin’s car all the way to the northeast (we stay in the southwest), laughed a lot, stopped by a petrol kiosk for some leather-cleaning — won’t go into details but, what a night.

Bumped into a couple of people that night, like Amanda. Haven’t seen her in ages so that was nice. Although I don’t remember taking those pictures (on her instagram).
Been meeting various people, which is what I’ve been meaning to do. During sem time it’s really hardly possible to meet anyone, and that always makes me feel like such a terrible friend.
11 May: DJ’s 21st



Some booze, good music and incredible company made a nice chill evening. We reached Lazarus Island just when the sun was setting and everyone started diving off the roof into the sea. Got literally thrown off the roof by Sherwin, which gave me a thigh-ful of burst blood vessels that are now bruises.


On the way back to the yacht club some of us stood by the railings and talked about all sorts of things from our overseas trip to our future kids. Passing countless of cargo ships, lights blaring and then darkness, the wind in our hair, the salt on our skin, the laughters. Makes me happy to know that these are the people I will grow old with.
After the party I headed home to wash up and was supposed to meet the rest at Bar On 5 but ended up only leaving the house around 3am for zouk. And the main incentive for me to head out was….. sausage and mash. Anyways, some of them came down to zouk for me and we just hung out outside velvet till we were all too tired and went home.

12 May: Mothers’ Day
Don’t even know how I managed to wake up. Must’ve been my love for my mom. My sister cooked Tom Yam Bee Hoon while my brother and I made Eggs Royale for the family.

It was surprisingly easy to make (besides the poaching the eggs bit). Used ciabatta instead because we couldn’t find english muffins at the supermarket, but it turned out well anyway. My brother and I were laughing about how the rest didn’t know what went into the hollandaise sauce…. one whole block of butter. And dad said we could open up a restaurant with that standard ^^ #success
13 May: Overeasy brunch

Met Ansen for a quick brunch at Overeasy. Because he was late I took a walk around Raffles Place and it was nice despite the crowd. The mexican breakfast (above) was recommended and it honestly looks better than it tastes - won’t go back again.
I still have more to update but this is already too long and I am really tired so that will have to wait. Spent the whole day editing my tumblr layout and am very pleased with it
so goodnight errboday x

changed my instagram user again to grxcefu
#indecisive lol
2 papers down, 2 more to gooooo
I’m already thrilled thinking about my bangkok trip, the boracay trip with the bali kids and all the post exam plans.
On a side note, finally moved to ask.fm because formspring has stopped allowing anonymous questions a longggg time ago. So ask awayyyy~
“Then what do you care about?”
“Love,” she said with a smile.
“Love?” Franz asked in amazement.
“Love is a battle,” said Marie-Claude, still smiling. “And I plan to go on fighting. To the end.”
“Love is a battle?” said Franz. “Well, I don’t feel at all like fighting.” And he left.
Monday - my little sister returned to the UK. I spent her last day here rushing out my film essay, studying for a test, and sleeping. #woesofaunistudent
Wednesday - Brunch at Maison Kayser (Scotts Square) with Jen. Did our nails and headed to Maison Kayser (Wheelock) for tea. The food there is pretty average. Our plan was to study, but as usual, we talked for hours on end. She always makes me feel that much better about everything x
Thursday - JC’s 22nd birthday
Saturday - went to the dogpark with this cutie and that beauty in the background. My two favourites ever. I was rather terrified of this greyhound, which was characteristically large.
Sunday - Wild Honey and “hanging” with the boys - Andre, Mig and SAG. As with all male friends, you don’t really take pictures with them when hanging out, so here’s a picture of my food and ootd.

And so as not to waste my makeup for the day, I shall throw in some selfies too.

ok have a good weds x
She felt attracted by their weakness as by vertigo. She felt attracted by it because she felt weak herself. Again she began to feel jealous and again her hands shook. When Tomas noticed it, he did what he usually did: he took her hands in his and tried to calm them by pressing hard. She tore them away from him.
“What’s the matter?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“What do you want me to do for you?”
“I want you to be old. Ten years older. Twenty years older!”
What she meant was: I want you to be weak. As weak as I am.
— The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera

reminds me of Bali; a time when we were happy. carefree.
omg totally hahaha. when some of us saw a stingray, some saw a dolphin, a fish, a shark, but all - after a moment of deliberation - frantically splashed our way back to shore. miss that.
It was all so perfect. We were going to go on a trip. I said, we musn’t fight. And you said, why would we, all that time knowing. You had just came over to visit, just to visit, and we did nothing. You said it was nice seeing me for that short while. All that love. And bliss.
And suddenly it all changed. Those lies changed everything forever. So just like that, it’s all gone.

No, John Green, the only reason why I’m still stuck in the fucking labyrinth of suffering is because I always chose to forgive.
(via typewrittenquotes)
someone once told me this, it doesn’t mean that you’re never going to get hurt but the pain you feel will never compare to the regret that comes from walking away from love.
that same person made me realise, four years later, that love really doesn’t mean anything
